Here’s How You’re Probably Ruining My Vacation

Vacation season is upon us and odds are good that someone is going to ruin it for you. Of course, it pains me to be the bearer of bad news. I mean, you haven’t even packed your new swimsuit or decided which junk foods to buy for your road trip and I’m already killing your getaway buzz.

But research has shown that being away on vacation actually makes people a little less intelligent than they probably are in normal surroundings and familiar routines.  A study from the University of Erlangen in Germany shows that extended time off and relaxation actually causes the brain’s frontal lobes to shrink.   In other words – while traveling this summer, brace yourself for a lot of dumb people – including yourself.

So while accidentally turning down a one-way street in a new city can be forgiven, being on vacation is never an excuse for forgetting how to behave.

Please Be Quiet

Hotel rooms aren’t made like sound proof recording studios.  When you come storming down the halls from a night on the town, chances are most of your fellow travelers are sleeping.  So while maybe you personally enjoy total strangers constantly yelling outside of your bedroom door at home – it’s not really for everybody.

Birds Of A Feather Don’t Need To Stick Together

One of the most annoying things to encounter when visiting a theme park or museum is the family that enjoys walking side by side, spread out together like a human chain, preventing anyone else from passing by.  Unless you’re lining up because another family has challenged you to an impromptu game of dodgeball – there’s no reason to take up an entire walkway.

Vacation Is Not The Place To Start Your Modeling Career 

Last year I was standing in front of the historic Alamo in San Antonio, Texas.  The sun was setting and about two dozen tourists were all trying to capture the perfect photo.  One problem: a lady decided she was going to prop herself up against the front of the building, completely oblivious that there were 30 cameras pointed in her direction, waiting for her to move out of the way.  Be aware of your surroundings.  Unless you’re on at least the “B” list of celebrities – tourists are probably trying to take photos of something behind you.

Speaking Of Photos… Take One And Keep Moving 

This time of the year, most places are swamped with tourists and all of them want that one great shot to share on Instagram or Facebook.  If you’re taking a picture of your kiddos in front of a statue, or Donald Duck at Disneyland – there are certainly others politely waiting for you to finish up and move along.

Get Away From Me

I know that standing in lines is an unavoidable part of travel.  Perhaps it’s my off-brand, glide-on deodorant that smells of freshly picked lilies – but, people always feel the need to stand directly beside me.  Please. Back. Up.  Just because we’re waiting in a line together doesn’t mean you have to be so close that I could turn around and count how many eyelashes you have.  Give people some space.

Blinkers Are Not Optional

 I’ve been driving long enough to know that this one’s a lost cause.  Using your turn signal lets other people know what on earth you’re going to do with your vehicle.  This is especially important because an overwhelming amount of America’s population lacks psychic abilities.  Save everyone some time and help me not crash into you or someone else by using your blinker.

 Just Be Nice

When I took an unscientific poll of family and friends about their biggest “people peeves” while traveling – almost all of the entries boiled down to one thing: people being rude.  We are always going to encounter others that only think of themselves who cut in lines, won’t get out of the passing lane on the freeway, or slam into you at the airport because they can’t stop texting for five minutes to pay attention to where they’re walking.  But, that doesn’t mean that you have to be one of those people.

There are lots of things to pack for your upcoming trip.  Don’t forget to bring along your manners.

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